How to Build a Large, Influential Law Firm (Part #4)

Respect Emotion, Examine Confidence, and Harness Passion

This series lifts the kimono and exposes the unvarnished details on how we built Sterling Law from scratch to be the largest, most influential family law firm in Wisconsin in less than 3 years.

I hope our story and the lessons help you build your practice or business.

Our Strategy Thesis described in Part #3 was well-reasoned. (See it here.) We had the market analysis supporting our conclusions.

The math made sense and checked out. Our conservative financial modeling seemed realistic. Logic was on our side.

What can go wrong in a startup?

A lot — as I have learned from failing in business 9 times.

Respecting Emotion’s Role in Business Success

Emotional awareness is far more important than the perfect business plan. Mike Tyson was right when he said “Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.”

We knew what a kick in the teeth felt like. A fat, dirty boot to the mouth really hurts.

There is no doubt. The founders’ emotional toughness will always be the decisive factor in a startup.

Tony and I spent long hours discussing our emotions about the opportunity. We explored how we would handle challenges.

Did we have the mental constitution and togetherness to keep going? Cognitive Therapists would have delighted seeing two left-brained dudes talking about feelings.

We had to know that our confidence sprang from the right experiences and well-honed skills. Sometimes founders are confident for all the wrong reasons. This becomes false hubris.

Hubris is nice, even essential. But hubris premised on misaligned experiences and incompetency is a slow train wreck. We recognized the demands for undaunted passion to power through face punches.

Tony and I agreed on the front end how we would respond. We concluded that we had the emotional intangibles.

Both of us felt excited and relished the fight ahead.

Confidence Forged through Live-Fire Experiences

Tony has a stoic demeanor. He doesn’t let many words out, but when he does, it’s worth a listen.

We met in early 2010 when he started as an intern at my digital agency, RocketClicks.com. He arrived as a skinny, intense young man eager to learn anything we put in front of him.

By 2012, Tony held the top marketing role at my DISH ecommerce business, DishPromotions.com. He and his team of eight oversaw a significant marketing budget and a complex set of projects.

He learned his craft in live-fire competition with razor sharp elbowed rivals. Tony intensely read and studied his profession.

He a had few losses. Enjoyed many wins. His confidence with digital marketing grew into unshakeable conviction.

For my part, I grew up in a community law firm in Menomonee Falls, WI. My first attorney job in 1997 was at McLario, Helm & Bertling, a well-respected firm.

From day one, it was thrilling. The partners threw me into the deep end, and I learned how to swim in real-time.

My learning curve was steep and bruising. The practice of law felt like hand-to-hand combat every day.

Older, more experienced attorneys love exerting their dominance over baby lawyers, which I was one.

On one occasion when I was a new attorney, the “top” family lawyer in Milwaukee cussed me out and hung up the phone. (This was the guy who got the most press and top rankings on all the media lists. The waters seemed to part when he was on a case.) I was intimidated and wondered what I did wrong.

He was bullying me, and I let him. That’s what happens when you are young, naive and clueless.

To his slight credit, after the case settled, he apologized. Of course, that was after he got what he wanted for his client. After he smacked me around and let me know who was “top dog.”

I definitely remember my “whimpering dog yard” moments more than the wins.

Back to the story.

I wanted to eat and live indoors. So, I hustled. My compensation hinged on me producing results to get paid.

I obsessed on my performance numbers and measured everything. I read numerous books on lawyering. I endlessly listened to self-improvement cassettes and CDs.

I remember going to Waldenbooks every month and buying 3-4 audio books with my little disposable income. My confidence was hard-earned, but it was solid.

Together, Tony and I felt a resolute confidence to take on the challenge of starting a disruptive law firm.

Passion to Modernize the Law Practice

We embrace and leverage technology. We are aggressive on this. The majority of law firms don’t and are years behind with technology usage.

Tony and I felt exhilarated at the idea of modernizing the “old school” practice of law. We saw many operational inefficiencies, and this fueled our creative energies.

Correct technology implementation would create more value for clients and attorneys alike. We wanted to improve client communications and the client experience while reducing costs.

We saw technology as an enhancer to build deeper client connections. It is also a tremendous tool to tell our story in ways that resonated with clients.

All stakeholders would benefit if we could deploy technology and modernize the practice of law. Clients would get a better service at cheaper costs. Lawyers would be more efficient.

Passion to Test Servant Leadership in a Law Firm

Lawyers are great at lawyering. They are not so great at leading.

Law schools don’t teach leadership. They definitely don’t teach the philosophy of the “Leader as a Servant First.”

There are many reasons ~85% of law firms have two or fewer attorneys. One major factor is that lawyers struggle to build effective teams. They usually don’t lead well.

We fundamentally believe that the most effective leaders serve others first. They build service cultures through their example. They obsess on serving the client first — and putting her at the center of every decision.

This is a huge vulnerability in the legal field. We knew we could exploit it.

Implementing servant leadership concepts into a law practice gave us another competitive advantage. With few exceptions, lawyers embrace change at a glacial pace.

Most law firm cultures default to what’s best for the lawyer, not the client. We felt that if we could build a firm that was all about the client, they would tell all their friends, and we would win.

This is where we wanted to build our legacy. We wanted to be the catalyst for change and show other law firms that the greatest success came from putting clients first.

Confronting My Insecurities and Anxieties

During the pre-launch phase I worried a lot. I try not to dwell on things I can’t control. I tend to do okay with this, especially with big things.

It’s the “insignificant” things that get me. They rattle around in my head like loose rock in a clothes dryer.

I worried that Tony would stay enthusiastic about the firm. He had put so much trust in my analysis and experience.

I wondered if he would remember too many of my past failures and decide the law firm was a dumb idea. He had been there during all three of our big layoffs and had lost friends through the whole ordeal.

My leadership failures had caused real hurt to people we cared about. People don’t forget painful team implosions.

I am also very prone to distractions. I love the “new.” If you rolled a shiny penny across my path in mid-conversation, I would lose my train of thought.

This is a weakness. I was aware of this flaw–most of the time. So, as a form of self-accountability, I publicly repeated this weakness. I wanted my team to know that I know. I needed their help to keep me focused.

I often expressed that my distraction problem was “our” greatest threat. I knew that I could crash the firm if left to my own decisions. I would push us in too many different directions.

At that point, the last few years comprised of an impressive string of failures. I was now, once again, making a huge reputational and financial bet.

The firm had to succeed. I was not sure how many losses I had left in my relationship and financial margin.

Preparing to Launch Sterling Law

By November of 2013, Tony and I were full time preparing to launch Sterling Law.

Our Strategy Thesis was simple. We didn’t have to get lucky to win. We had to show up every day and stay focused. We only had to hit singles. Home runs were a bonus.

It was the small things over and over and over that carved the path to winning. We controlled our consistency, or not.

There was no outside force that determined our destiny. This simplicity set us free. Most business plays out this way.

When I had lost in business in the past, I had either (1) got distracted or (2) relied too much on needing to hit a trick shot to win.

With the law firm, we didn’t need much to break our way. We had to do what we knew we could do each boring week after each boring week.

Takeaways as We Evaluated the Intangibles of our Startup Plan:

1) Decide in advance how you will respond “when” you get punched in the mouth. This is not an “if you get punched” but a “when.” Starting a business is an emotionally risky process. Expecting adversity and determining your response beforehand helps build the required mental toughness.

2) Be self-aware of “why” you are confident. You might have dumb, hard-headed confidence because you are stubborn? You might be an emotionally strong person, and that characteristic sources your confidence? Or, the best is when you are confident because you have the skills and experience your new business demands. Make no mistake. Starting and building a business demands confidence! Lots of it (for the right reasons).

3) Have the passion to energize you through the hard times. The thirst for profits will only take you so far. There has to be more that you are passionate about. For us, it was two things: (a) the puzzle of implementing technology solutions in an “old school” market and (b) testing our Servant Leadership philosophy to build a client-centered firm. Founders need a strong “why” to supply the passion to get a business to elite levels.

4) Confront your insecurities and stifle the voice in your head. We all have head trash that create toxins to success. If you don’t think you do, you probably have more than most. We all benefit when someone speaks truth into our lives and helps us get to the healthiest place possible. I urge you to find that person who wants what’s best for you and has the wisdom and courage to speak truth to you. A founder’s insecurities are a subtle killer of many startups.

Dear Reader, I would love to read your comments or questions below.

I will post the next Part of our journey each week until done.  You can subscribe below to receive updates.

See “How to Build a Large, Influential Law Firm (Part #1)” here.

See “How to Build a Large, Influential Law Firm (Part #2)” here.

See “How to Build a Large, Influential Law Firm (Part #3)” here.